Who are you ?

People always say you must be patient, for you do not find true love, but true love finds you. What they don’t say is how to handle going unnoticed your whole life and expecting to be found.

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I’m practically difficult. So difficult even. I tell you why.

Often times, i reject those ‘new people’ who try to come in to my life, if this ‘new guy’ does not comply with my list.

He has to look good.
He has to work well.
He has to be smart.
He has to keep the conversation going, no matter what.

Difficult, i know. Thats why i put the standard lower now.

He has to look good. Well at least he’s not ugly.
He has to work well. Well at least he earn some money. Prett.
He has to be smart. Well at least he can speak english. Lol.
He has to keep the conversation going, no matter what. Well this still an important thing tho.

See ? I’m easy now. Prettt.

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But ya, it always depends on the list. If he fails in one of the list, then bye.

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But yeah, like the title said,
kamu siapa ?
WHO AM I?

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I dont look that good.
I dont work that well.
Im not that smart.
And i (mostly) fail to keep the conversation going.

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Jadi adalah seseorang yang kemudian menyadarkan saya akan hal ini. He asked why am i still single ? Then i answered dengan jawaban andalan, “I am the kind of person yang kalau mau beli baju aja lama mikirnya, mau makan apa dan dimana lama mikirnya, mau kemana pas weekend lama menimbangnya, nah apalagi mau memilih pasangan yang kelak akan berbagi suka duka, peluh dan keringat.”

I thought i was winning by answering that question. Tapi justru lawan bicara saya menimpal, “Nah ini. It seems you are the most wanted gay on earth by saying that. You, you have to clearly face the truth. Oke, maybe you look good enough or whatever. But dear, people can always do the same like the way you eliminate them. You can set your standard so on and so forth. And you think that others cant do the same ? And you, you know that you’re not the only single gay in city right ?”

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Memerah muka saya saat itu pasti. Bukan blushing karena dipuji memiliki prinsip hidup. Tetapi lebih karena tertampar karena selama ini sudah demikian angkuh.

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Saya selalu tidak meresponse dengan hangat ketika misalnya me and my friends hang out, lalu kemudian adalah temannya teman saya yang misalnya agak tertarik dengan saya, lalu mencoba untuk mendekati dengan bertanya ini itu, yang pasti saya jawab dengan singkat without any enthusiasm.

Always. I always do that.

Yang kemudian temans saya semua ngeh dan aware dengan this habit. “Kenapa ? Not your type again ya dear ?”

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Again, saya mungkin memang punya standard tentang calon dating-an saya, tetapi adakah saya dengan sadar mengetahui bahwa calon datingan saya juga mempunyai hak yang sama to create their own list ? Kalau saya boleh menuliskan “He has to keep the conversation going no matter what”, kan dia juga boleh ya ? Dan tentu saya uda failed dong ya kalau jawaban saya aja singkat putus-putus tanpa antusias atas semua pertanyaan hangat yang dilontarkannya ?

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But yah, Sure its our decision to have a list, and you should create one if you dont have it, but please be warm. Be good. Be welcoming. Be polite to respond back at least.

Again, you are not a famous artist, well even artis aja kalo diajak foto sama yang looknya jelek sekalipun tetep mau, nah lo ? And maybe that became the reason that people that you like never like you back ?

So be polite to just give a try. Unless you want to stay single for the rest of your life.

Prett.

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Keris, try me now. I will be sooooo cheap to respond whatever comes. Pretttt.